Monday, November 10, 2014

A Reappearance and Happy Fall

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As you see, I have re-appeared.

Happy Fall everyone! To me, fall is the most magical time of year. Change and leaves are in the wind, and spices mingle with warmth, crisp apples, and smiles.

Now to update you on a recent event:

I had to take a test last week (placement exam for college.) I will admit, it made me nervous. I was especially anxious about the math section. This represents my feelings about algebra:

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And then there's always this possibility. One of the worst feelings ever:

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I signed in for the test and tentatively approached the large, rather outdated computer/monitor that would be mine for the next several hours. I sat in the chair which, as a side note, had the capacity to roll across the floor and spin around in a circle. I thought that was a rather nice touch. With an eye on the clock (closing time wasn't far away), I clicked my way through the test. Hovering in the back of my mind were several ever-present thoughts, mostly totally irrational. You see, even with all my problems with procrastination and such, underneath it all lies a compulsive perfectionist and overachiever. This is similar to conversations I've had in the past:

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 Little grenades of self-doubt went off in my subconscious:

     "I've probably forgotten everything I've ever learned. They're going to make me do high school again."
     (Looking at a math problem) "What is that symbol!?! Did I even DO math in school?" 
     (Hyperventilating) "If I'd reviewed for 17 hours a day like I'd originally planned, I'd be acing this test but now I'm going to set an all-time record- for the lowest math score EVER."

A couple hours later, with great relief and mild apprehension, I completed the last step of the test (an on-the-spot essay.) I was exhausted. I stumbled out of the room to collect my stuff from the locker and sign out.

As usually happens with these sorts of things, my worrying was a waste of time. Everything turned out absolutely fine. My scores were just fine. My future did not hold a repetition of high school (is that even a thing?). I still hate tests though.

Hopefully, I will be back soon with more updates.

Until then, stay cozy. Maybe light a fall candle. Eat an apple (they're good for your teeth.)

Love, Celia

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